love gives me hope

In 1950, two teenagers met on a beach and quickly fell in love.

The boy was in the Marines and lived in Cherry Point, NC. The girl lived in Greenville, NC. The boy hitchiked an hour and a half each way every single day for two years to see his girlfriend.

Those two teenagers are now my grandparents, and they have been married for 59 years. Their love gives me hope.

That is just one example from a website called Love Gives Me Hope. I have been reading it for the past hour and I highly recommend it for inspirational stories of love and compassion.


I have never been in love. I love my family and close friends, but not the kind of sweep-you-off-your-feet love that this experience encompasses. A beautiful, rare emotion - raw; nothing like it. Someone once told me that I come off as an intimidating individual, set in her ways and independent in every way, which might scare some people. I always keep that in the back of my mind when I meet new people, thinking that might keep them from loving me. I think that makes me part of who I am.

I am driven, independent, involved, busy - but I lack something I wish I possessed. The love of an individual who will be there to support through everything I conquer and take on, no matter how busy I get. I need a rock. I admitted the other day that I actually have a pretty low self-esteem, which makes being as strong as I come off difficult sometimes. I act like I have it all together, but that is very false. On the outside, sure, I may look put together and ready to conquer the world with my impressive resume and busy schedule, but that is a facade.

Inside I am searching for answers, questioning myself and my actions - I constantly need reassurance. It is my biggest weakness, and I am ashamed of it.

I know what I am looking for in my life. I have an idea of what I am trying to achieve; but, I wish I had someone to share those dreams with me in a different way than the friends and family I already share them with. Something more, something different.

This post is extremely cheesy and I apologize; it is raw emotion and I am not going back and editing it, I am just speaking as it comes to me, right now, at 11:57 on April 28, 2010.

Questions unanswered, wondering, how? Why? Continuing to do so - I question everything. Second guess every movement. Will I ever know?

love gives me hope.