This summer I have become a Thought Catalog addict. Everyone has their normal routine when they casually open their laptop/desktop and go online. Mine, for the past several months has been: Gmail, Twitter, Facebook, Scholar (Virginia Tech's version of Blackboard) and some Pinterest thrown in there. In early May of this year, I saw a post on Twitter about Thought Catalog and decided to check it out, and I could not have been more glad that I did. As an English major, I enjoy lighthearted essays/short stories about everyday events (i.e., blogs, features articles, etc) and Thought Catalog is basically that.
One of the first posts I stumbled across on the website was one entitled "Moments Everyone Needs More Of," which detailed moments that would seemingly make everyone's lives better if these were to happen on any given day in a person's life. I liked the idea. I liked what the post had to say, and I agreed with it to an extent. Now, I have decided to make my own list of "Moments Everyone Needs More Of" that I believe would make for a pleasant surprise in our everyday world of hustle and bustle.
1. Go on a spur of the moment road trip for your own sanity.
2. Put down the windows and drive not worrying about how your hair will look or how hot it is outside.
3. Surprise yourself.
4. Do something that makes you feel like a carefree kid.
5. Eat a popsicle, outside, in July and enjoy every sugary ounce dripping down the back of your hand.
6. Take a bubble bath.
7. Sing at the top of your lungs while you drive.
8. Prove to yourself that you can get what you want.
9. Treat yourself to some superfluous purchase.
10. Let someone make you feel worthy of being loved.
All of these things take you out of the commotion-filled world that we are surrounded by everyday.
The best moments are
usually the underrated ones, the ones that are cloaked in the quiet. In
the end, these are the kind of things that you’ll remember — the things
that made you feel human.
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
Dobie: One Year.
On June 21, 2011, I wrote this:
I think my Grandpa is the best thing since sliced bread.
It is still one of the truest statements I have ever written, and I believe it every time I think about my grandfather who I called "Dobie." (Side note -- I've been calling him Dobie since I could speak, circa 1992, so I think JK Rowling might need to give me credit - ha!) Dobie always called me his "sack of potatoes."
It's been a little less than a year since Dobie passed away. July 14 will be one year to be exact. Before Dobie, I had been fortunate that I had not lost anyone close to me that I had known at an older age.
The entire scene played out in a time span of a short three days...
July 11: My parents and I were flying home from a friend's wedding in Newport, Rhode Island. My parents flew into Richmond, while I was flying into Lynchburg since I spent the summer at Tech. It was my first experience flying by myself, and although I had no fear of flying, I was nervous about getting to my gate(s) on time and making sure I could find my way around. From Boston I flew into Charlotte, NC, where my carry on was taken with the rest of the larger baggage due to lack of overhead space -- sure, fine, no problem -- but as soon as I got on the plane I had a feeling my bag hadn't been put on the plane. When I landed in Lynchburg, my assumption turned out to be correct. At this point it is 6:30 p.m., the day before Freshman Orientation at Virginia Tech, where I am scheduled to work at 7:30 a.m. at the SGA Hokie Effect booth to promote the shirts and SGA as a whole. With my bag still in Charlotte, my phone at 5% battery (charger in my bag in Charlotte) and being the ONLY passenger in the tiny Lynchburg airport, for some reason my emotions got the best of me and I literally sat down in the middle of the floor and started crying because I didn't know what to do. The people who worked at the airline were very kind and helpful, but I still wouldn't get my bag back for another two hours. What was I supposed to do for two hours? I was tired, hungry, and just a little pissed off. Well, since I was in Lynchburg, I called one of my most trusted sisters, Ellen, and she immediately told me to drive to her house and that we were going out to dinner. I showed up, and so did two of my other sorority sisters (who accepted me at a nice dinner even though I was clad in an oversized Tech shirt and running shorts, hair in a messy bun). Dinner made everything better.
I got back to the airport after they called me to tell me that my bag had safely arrived, and I picked it up and was on my way to school, my phone still about to die. My parents called to make sure everything was going smoothly, told them I was on my way home and that my phone was about to die so I would call when I got back to Blacksburg. I eventually got back to school, around 11 p.m., charged my phone a little, called my parents, and immediately received a verbal smackdown for not calling sooner. I explained the phone situation, but no matter what I said I was still in the wrong. I knew something wasn't right, this wasn't like my parents. I ended up angrily hanging up on my Mom, giving both of us a few needed minutes to calm down. Ten minutes later she called back, told me to sit down, and that she needed to tell me something...I sat down, and prepared myself for whatever she had to say. Today, Didi (my grandma) and Dobie were on their porch having wine, just line any other night after dinner, and Dobie asked Didi if she would like another glass, she said 'That would be nice Kit, thank you,' so he went inside to get her one, my Mom said. He was taking a while, so she started thinking 'What the heck is taking him so long the wine is right on the counter,' so Didi went inside to see what Dobie was doing, and she found him laying unconscious on the kitchen floor... My heart sank. I didn't even know what to say to my Mom on the phone. "Didi tried to give him CPR, she yelled for the neighbors, she called 911...my mom begins to cry...they rushed him to the hospital and he is in ICU on life support right now.... My Dad gets on the phone...Kels, listen, Dobie's strong, don't worry, go to bed you've had a long day, we will talk in the morning and figure out if you need to come home. We love you, goodnight.
I couldn't even say anything, I just hung up. I sat in my bed and didn't even know what to think, I didn't cry. It takes a lot for me to cry, and just thinking about the future and what could happen and Dobie in the hospital, I lost it. I called my parents at 1:30 a.m., my Mom groggily answering the phone, and all I could say was He can't die yet, he can't die yet. I wasn't coherent, I couldn't say anything else, my body and mind wouldn't let me. My Mom replied with, I know, Kels, I know...Her voice gave it all away. We were all feeling the same way, we all knew what was going to happen, we just couldn't come to terms with it yet.
July 12: Orientation Day 1. I woke up early and arrived at Squires around 7 a.m. to set up for the day. My mind was with my grandfather; my eyes were glazed over, I was barely talking. I wasn't myself at all. I made it through the morning, then decided to get my oil changed (why that took precedence I have no idea) and while at the mechanic I got a call from my Mom. Hi Kels, umm, I...(the tears begin)...you need to come home. Pack a bag, leave now, come home. And that's what I did. That was what I did. I called my Little on the way home, she kindly came over and packed for me because I couldn't seem to form thoughts or words, I filled up my car, and I was on my way home. I don't remember driving four and a half hours, all I remember is getting home and getting in the car with my Dad to drive to VA Beach.
We arrived at the hospital around 4 p.m. I was the last one to arrive, and as the elevator doors opened, my entire family was in the waiting room. Friends of my family -- everyone was there. Mom and my Aunt took me back to see Dobie. He opened his eyes for me, looked right at me, I squeezed his hand. We had about four seconds of eye contact, and that was it. He didn't open his eyes ever again. He waited for me, his "sack of potatoes," to get there.
From there, everything is a blur of two days. He passed away that Wednesday, July 14, when all of us had left his room. So many details encompassed those next two days and they are all present in my mind, but make no sense at all. Driving home from the funeral was surreal, and my Mom and I witnessed several sights that I still can't believe were real; signs from Dobie to let us know he is now okay.
I want to say thank you for those of you who were there for me this summer through everything: Bitty, Jaime, Corbin, Emily, Stevie, and the rest of you, you know who you are. I couldn't have done it without you all. And here's to Dobie, one of the greatest men I have ever known.
I think my Grandpa is the best thing since sliced bread.
It is still one of the truest statements I have ever written, and I believe it every time I think about my grandfather who I called "Dobie." (Side note -- I've been calling him Dobie since I could speak, circa 1992, so I think JK Rowling might need to give me credit - ha!) Dobie always called me his "sack of potatoes."
It's been a little less than a year since Dobie passed away. July 14 will be one year to be exact. Before Dobie, I had been fortunate that I had not lost anyone close to me that I had known at an older age.
The entire scene played out in a time span of a short three days...
July 11: My parents and I were flying home from a friend's wedding in Newport, Rhode Island. My parents flew into Richmond, while I was flying into Lynchburg since I spent the summer at Tech. It was my first experience flying by myself, and although I had no fear of flying, I was nervous about getting to my gate(s) on time and making sure I could find my way around. From Boston I flew into Charlotte, NC, where my carry on was taken with the rest of the larger baggage due to lack of overhead space -- sure, fine, no problem -- but as soon as I got on the plane I had a feeling my bag hadn't been put on the plane. When I landed in Lynchburg, my assumption turned out to be correct. At this point it is 6:30 p.m., the day before Freshman Orientation at Virginia Tech, where I am scheduled to work at 7:30 a.m. at the SGA Hokie Effect booth to promote the shirts and SGA as a whole. With my bag still in Charlotte, my phone at 5% battery (charger in my bag in Charlotte) and being the ONLY passenger in the tiny Lynchburg airport, for some reason my emotions got the best of me and I literally sat down in the middle of the floor and started crying because I didn't know what to do. The people who worked at the airline were very kind and helpful, but I still wouldn't get my bag back for another two hours. What was I supposed to do for two hours? I was tired, hungry, and just a little pissed off. Well, since I was in Lynchburg, I called one of my most trusted sisters, Ellen, and she immediately told me to drive to her house and that we were going out to dinner. I showed up, and so did two of my other sorority sisters (who accepted me at a nice dinner even though I was clad in an oversized Tech shirt and running shorts, hair in a messy bun). Dinner made everything better.
I got back to the airport after they called me to tell me that my bag had safely arrived, and I picked it up and was on my way to school, my phone still about to die. My parents called to make sure everything was going smoothly, told them I was on my way home and that my phone was about to die so I would call when I got back to Blacksburg. I eventually got back to school, around 11 p.m., charged my phone a little, called my parents, and immediately received a verbal smackdown for not calling sooner. I explained the phone situation, but no matter what I said I was still in the wrong. I knew something wasn't right, this wasn't like my parents. I ended up angrily hanging up on my Mom, giving both of us a few needed minutes to calm down. Ten minutes later she called back, told me to sit down, and that she needed to tell me something...I sat down, and prepared myself for whatever she had to say. Today, Didi (my grandma) and Dobie were on their porch having wine, just line any other night after dinner, and Dobie asked Didi if she would like another glass, she said 'That would be nice Kit, thank you,' so he went inside to get her one, my Mom said. He was taking a while, so she started thinking 'What the heck is taking him so long the wine is right on the counter,' so Didi went inside to see what Dobie was doing, and she found him laying unconscious on the kitchen floor... My heart sank. I didn't even know what to say to my Mom on the phone. "Didi tried to give him CPR, she yelled for the neighbors, she called 911...my mom begins to cry...they rushed him to the hospital and he is in ICU on life support right now.... My Dad gets on the phone...Kels, listen, Dobie's strong, don't worry, go to bed you've had a long day, we will talk in the morning and figure out if you need to come home. We love you, goodnight.
I couldn't even say anything, I just hung up. I sat in my bed and didn't even know what to think, I didn't cry. It takes a lot for me to cry, and just thinking about the future and what could happen and Dobie in the hospital, I lost it. I called my parents at 1:30 a.m., my Mom groggily answering the phone, and all I could say was He can't die yet, he can't die yet. I wasn't coherent, I couldn't say anything else, my body and mind wouldn't let me. My Mom replied with, I know, Kels, I know...Her voice gave it all away. We were all feeling the same way, we all knew what was going to happen, we just couldn't come to terms with it yet.
July 12: Orientation Day 1. I woke up early and arrived at Squires around 7 a.m. to set up for the day. My mind was with my grandfather; my eyes were glazed over, I was barely talking. I wasn't myself at all. I made it through the morning, then decided to get my oil changed (why that took precedence I have no idea) and while at the mechanic I got a call from my Mom. Hi Kels, umm, I...(the tears begin)...you need to come home. Pack a bag, leave now, come home. And that's what I did. That was what I did. I called my Little on the way home, she kindly came over and packed for me because I couldn't seem to form thoughts or words, I filled up my car, and I was on my way home. I don't remember driving four and a half hours, all I remember is getting home and getting in the car with my Dad to drive to VA Beach.
We arrived at the hospital around 4 p.m. I was the last one to arrive, and as the elevator doors opened, my entire family was in the waiting room. Friends of my family -- everyone was there. Mom and my Aunt took me back to see Dobie. He opened his eyes for me, looked right at me, I squeezed his hand. We had about four seconds of eye contact, and that was it. He didn't open his eyes ever again. He waited for me, his "sack of potatoes," to get there.
From there, everything is a blur of two days. He passed away that Wednesday, July 14, when all of us had left his room. So many details encompassed those next two days and they are all present in my mind, but make no sense at all. Driving home from the funeral was surreal, and my Mom and I witnessed several sights that I still can't believe were real; signs from Dobie to let us know he is now okay.
I want to say thank you for those of you who were there for me this summer through everything: Bitty, Jaime, Corbin, Emily, Stevie, and the rest of you, you know who you are. I couldn't have done it without you all. And here's to Dobie, one of the greatest men I have ever known.
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Lessons I Learned as an Undergrad
Four years at Virginia Tech taught me many lessons. I learned that I absolutely, 100 percent, must have my alone time during the day; that sisters make the best of friends; and that Friday nights are best spent laughing and dancing hilariously in the car on your way to Cookout at midnight. I loved undergrad. I would have done many things differently, treated many relationships differently -- but that's behind me, no going back now. Four years taught me a lot, and one thing is for sure, I would not do it again. Why try to change the four years that changed you? Everything happened the way that it should have at the time it was supposed to, and I would not want to taint that.
Just for fun, here is a list of a few important lessons that I learned during undergrad:
1. Make time for some good, old fashioned fun. Now, you might be thinking, "College is PACKED full of fun, what a dumb lesson you learned..." but riddle me this: We all get caught up in our own little world -- that ten-page paper is due in two days, it's TOTS Tuesday, you want to drink. Downtown is fun, we all love a good time downtown. But sometimes you need to take a break from homework, from the downtown life, to engage in a little old, fashioned fun. Next you might be thinking, "What do you mean by 'old-fashioned fun'?" Here is what I mean: laughing until you can't breathe, watching Disney movies until 3 a.m., sleepovers at your friends' apartment, singing your heart out to "Call Me Maybe" as you drive down Main Street. The fun that is innocent, small, but means the world to you and your friends in the moment. Take some time for good, old fashioned fun.
2. Take advantage of your surrounding opportunities. For those of you who the know me well, or who known the "Virginia Tech Kelsey Heiter," you know that I defined myself by my activities in college. Whether this was a good or bad decision is not for you to decide, it is what I did and I don't regret it in the least. Running from meeting to meeting, then off to the Empo to finish homework before going to bed at 2 a.m. -- I loved it, I thrived off of it; it made me who I am today. My motive? I wanted to do everything that I possibly could because I knew I would never be able to do it again. When are we ever again going to have over 700 clubs and extra curricular activities at our fingertips, with over 25,000 people to engage with, as well as a community that welcomes us with open arms for the majority of the year? For most of us, the answer is never again. During college we live in a fun little bubble; a bubble of friends, opportunities; everything that we need, for the most part, surrounds us in this very place. I wanted to soak in every chance I had to make a difference, make an impact, or leave my mark at Virginia Tech. These activities defined my life for the past four years, introduced me to some of the most amazing individuals I have ever met, and made me realize how blessed we are to have these opportunities at our disposal. Take advantage of what is around you, do not pass any significant opportunity for some extra sleep or a half off pitcher at the Cellar.
3. Learn something new, and own it. We come to college to learn. Learn about mechanical engineering, or the history behind the French language -- whatever it is, we can safely say we learn at least something new in each class. I learned lots of new ideas/concepts/thoughts/people/opinions/etc. at Tech -- we all did. Luckily, several important people showed me how to take what I learned and enhance it one step further by owning it. For example, I learned in leadership class freshman year, what it takes to be a good leader. From these few classes, I look those skills, and with the help of my peers and advisers, took those skills, crafted them, applied them to my life, and owned them. And I mean really owned them. I made these skills my own, put my own twist on them, and applied them to my life, as well as others. Your education is what you make of it. If you leave college knowing something new, great, but you have to do something to make it have an impact on the world, to make it important. Learn that and you will not be sorry.
4. Spend time with those who matter the most to you. The summer before my senior year I lost my grandfather. He was one of the very most important people in my life, and I miss him all the time. I was fortunate enough to spend great amounts of time with him over the years, forming a deep, special bond that I will never forget. Spend time with your grandparents, great-grandparents if you're so lucky. These individuals have much to teach us, and can offer you love, wisdom, and insight that you will never learn from a textbook or on a college campus. They have experienced life, and have something to show for it. Every time I see my grandmother, I get her to tell me another story from her life -- something small that makes her smile, or the story of how she met my grandfather, or the first time she taught my Mom to ride a bike. We never know what the next day will bring, so take the time to let those special people in your life know how much they mean to you. Your grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, sisters, brothers -- we are only on this Earth for a short while and I think sometimes we forget that.
5. Don't be afraid to show your emotions and express your opinions. We try so hard to please people through the way we dress, act, say, do, dance, laugh, cry, etc. At 21 years old I finally feel comfortable enough to laugh loud enough that I snort, or politely disagree with someone, or even cry when I feel the need. Don't hide how you feel for the sake of feeling rejected, or looked down on, by others. This is your life, why would you let your fear of not pleasing others stop you from living the way you want? Please don't. We are all made and put on this Earth because we have something unique and special to offer -- show that to the world.
College taught me about life. Sure, I learned something about communication and English, but what I really learned was why I am passionate for the things I enjoy, and how to apply that to my life to formulate some sort of career. I may be overstepping my boundaries because I am going to graduate school, so I still have two more years to fine tune my skills, but these lessons have transformed and molded me into the person I am today -- and take it or leave it, this is what you get.
Just for fun, here is a list of a few important lessons that I learned during undergrad:
1. Make time for some good, old fashioned fun. Now, you might be thinking, "College is PACKED full of fun, what a dumb lesson you learned..." but riddle me this: We all get caught up in our own little world -- that ten-page paper is due in two days, it's TOTS Tuesday, you want to drink. Downtown is fun, we all love a good time downtown. But sometimes you need to take a break from homework, from the downtown life, to engage in a little old, fashioned fun. Next you might be thinking, "What do you mean by 'old-fashioned fun'?" Here is what I mean: laughing until you can't breathe, watching Disney movies until 3 a.m., sleepovers at your friends' apartment, singing your heart out to "Call Me Maybe" as you drive down Main Street. The fun that is innocent, small, but means the world to you and your friends in the moment. Take some time for good, old fashioned fun.
2. Take advantage of your surrounding opportunities. For those of you who the know me well, or who known the "Virginia Tech Kelsey Heiter," you know that I defined myself by my activities in college. Whether this was a good or bad decision is not for you to decide, it is what I did and I don't regret it in the least. Running from meeting to meeting, then off to the Empo to finish homework before going to bed at 2 a.m. -- I loved it, I thrived off of it; it made me who I am today. My motive? I wanted to do everything that I possibly could because I knew I would never be able to do it again. When are we ever again going to have over 700 clubs and extra curricular activities at our fingertips, with over 25,000 people to engage with, as well as a community that welcomes us with open arms for the majority of the year? For most of us, the answer is never again. During college we live in a fun little bubble; a bubble of friends, opportunities; everything that we need, for the most part, surrounds us in this very place. I wanted to soak in every chance I had to make a difference, make an impact, or leave my mark at Virginia Tech. These activities defined my life for the past four years, introduced me to some of the most amazing individuals I have ever met, and made me realize how blessed we are to have these opportunities at our disposal. Take advantage of what is around you, do not pass any significant opportunity for some extra sleep or a half off pitcher at the Cellar.
3. Learn something new, and own it. We come to college to learn. Learn about mechanical engineering, or the history behind the French language -- whatever it is, we can safely say we learn at least something new in each class. I learned lots of new ideas/concepts/thoughts/people/opinions/etc. at Tech -- we all did. Luckily, several important people showed me how to take what I learned and enhance it one step further by owning it. For example, I learned in leadership class freshman year, what it takes to be a good leader. From these few classes, I look those skills, and with the help of my peers and advisers, took those skills, crafted them, applied them to my life, and owned them. And I mean really owned them. I made these skills my own, put my own twist on them, and applied them to my life, as well as others. Your education is what you make of it. If you leave college knowing something new, great, but you have to do something to make it have an impact on the world, to make it important. Learn that and you will not be sorry.
4. Spend time with those who matter the most to you. The summer before my senior year I lost my grandfather. He was one of the very most important people in my life, and I miss him all the time. I was fortunate enough to spend great amounts of time with him over the years, forming a deep, special bond that I will never forget. Spend time with your grandparents, great-grandparents if you're so lucky. These individuals have much to teach us, and can offer you love, wisdom, and insight that you will never learn from a textbook or on a college campus. They have experienced life, and have something to show for it. Every time I see my grandmother, I get her to tell me another story from her life -- something small that makes her smile, or the story of how she met my grandfather, or the first time she taught my Mom to ride a bike. We never know what the next day will bring, so take the time to let those special people in your life know how much they mean to you. Your grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, sisters, brothers -- we are only on this Earth for a short while and I think sometimes we forget that.
5. Don't be afraid to show your emotions and express your opinions. We try so hard to please people through the way we dress, act, say, do, dance, laugh, cry, etc. At 21 years old I finally feel comfortable enough to laugh loud enough that I snort, or politely disagree with someone, or even cry when I feel the need. Don't hide how you feel for the sake of feeling rejected, or looked down on, by others. This is your life, why would you let your fear of not pleasing others stop you from living the way you want? Please don't. We are all made and put on this Earth because we have something unique and special to offer -- show that to the world.
College taught me about life. Sure, I learned something about communication and English, but what I really learned was why I am passionate for the things I enjoy, and how to apply that to my life to formulate some sort of career. I may be overstepping my boundaries because I am going to graduate school, so I still have two more years to fine tune my skills, but these lessons have transformed and molded me into the person I am today -- and take it or leave it, this is what you get.
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